Wednesday, April 18, 2007


Women's bodies are amazing. Not just because we can create new life. Don't get me wrong, that is absolutely imcredible.

What I find just as amazing is our ability to totally forget and ignore what it's "really" like to create that new life.

I'll admit, I'm envious of those women who brag about how much they love being pregnant and how easy it is. I am not one of those women.

For me, pregnancy is hard, it's tiring, it's constant. It's 40 long weeks filled with some nasea, tons of heart burn, swelling, migraines, tiredness, grouchiness and the sinking feeling that you will NEVER have time to get everything done in those short 40 weeks.

Yet, when I look back on being pregnant with Kaitlyn, I don't think of those things. I don't think of the throwing up constantly for the first 5-6 months. I don't think of the hip pain so bad I would sit on the ground crying and force Dusty to come home from work. I don't think about the migraines that wouldn't stop.

I remember feeling her kick. I remember how funny it was to see her foot stick out of my belly and being able to clearly see toes. I remember how much more comfortable maternity clothes are! I remember how I felt when I realized that I knew her sleep and awake pattern and I could feel her and experiance her in a way that no one else could.

And then there's giving birth. As far as deliveries go, I know I'm pretty lucky. After Kaitlyn was born, even that following morning I didn't think of the pain. I thought of how amazed I was that she was actually here. Her first cry. The first time she nursed, the first time she looked at me and how perfect she was. I remebered how Dusty was the master at swaddling and keeping her asleep so I could stay asleep.

My delivery wasn't perfect, but I know those who've had far worse. I have scoliosis in my lower back. That epidural I dreamed of only worked on the right side of my hip and only for the second stage of labor. Once I hit about 8 cm dialated, it didn't work at all. I only wanted to lay on my right side, it after all wasn't in as much pain. But, Kaitlyn didn't like that side and I had to have oxygen and lay on my left side! Darn her!!

I was fortunate that I was admitted at about 1:00 PM and she was here at 9:02 PM. I pushed for about an hour and fourty-five minutes. I was exhausted, I hadn't slept the night before and I hadn't eaten since the night before. All I wanted was a McChicken!! I changed positions and sat up and wouldn't ya know it? She practically popped out (note for next time!)

While your in pregnancy, you remember every part of the negative. You remember the pain, the stess, the wanting to cry every 20 minutes. With your first pregnancy you say, "I'm never doing this again, it can't be worth it"

With your second pregnancy, you know it is. You know what you get to look forward to and the days melt away!

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