Wednesday, August 8, 2012

20 week OB appointment and the last day of Summer!!

Today was the last day of summer vacation. And it was busy. We started the day off with a meeting at the March of Dimes Greater Capital Division office. We are incredibly blown away and honored to have been asked to be the 2013 Greater Capital Division March of Dimes Ambassador Family. We are beyond honored and so excited to be a part of such an amazing organization. From there we stopped by a couple of Walmarts looking for some things for Dusty. After striking out at two of them, we headed to my 20 week OB appointment. I'm up 13 lbs, woo-hoo, which is about 7 shy of what my doctor's goal is. So, when I return to the OB in a month for a normal appointment, my goal is to have gained another 11. Um. Yeah that is gonna be a little difficult I think. For the horrific reflux, I get to keep taking Zantac twice a day and in addition to the Tums, I can add in Maloxx or Mylanta. Here's hoping it works and I can start eating some yummy food again. Unlike yesterday when little one wouldn't move regardless of anything anyone did, this time she was going insane and had no desire to sit still to have her heart beat examined. But, eventually we got it for a moment. The course of treatment has changed slightly. The recommended course of action for p17 with Samantha had been to go from week 16 to week 36. 20 weeks of injections. This time, they are stopping them at 34 weeks. Which is the same cut off for when they would administer steroid injections. After my appointment we dropped lunch off to Dusty and went and got our own lunch at Burger King. Who was out of ICEE's. And frozen lemonades. Both, the only reasons we went there. We headed to IKEA to exchange a part of a chair. When we went on Saturday to get Kaitlyn a new chair for her desk, the aisle was all messed up and I managed to get a bottom and a top that do not match, do not fit together and will not work. There were 4 people ahead of us. It took over an hour to get it exchanged. Absolutely ridiculous. I was so frustrated. As was Kaitlyn. Luckily, we were able to de-stress when we went to get manis and pedis with Grandma. Samantha was a bit jealous. But, while she likes having her nails and toes painted, you have to use the instant dry polish or she thinks it's finger painting... So, she was given a lollipop and my iphone to play with. With pretty fingers and pretty toes, we went and Kaitlyn picked out a new pair of glasses to be a back up pair. She chose a really cute pink wire frame pair that should be here in a week and a half. She also got a couple new cases for her glasses since her first pair came with a soft case and I know this kid. And then we headed home. Where the air is fixed and it's a perfect 68 degrees. It's off to cheer and bed time before Kaitlyn's first day of 3rd grade tomorrow!

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

20 weeks and happy anniversary

Half way there! Woo-hoo!

Little baby __________ is measuring 12 ounces, still a girl, loves sucking on her fingers and is stubborn as can be. It looks like she'll have sleep habits more like Kaitlyn and less like Samantha. My cervix is an awesome 3.6cm and my complete anterior placenta previa is now a marginal anterior placenta previa, which is good news. The hope is my placenta's position will shift as the uterus grows and all will be well.

I now get to have my weekly injection appointment, bi-weekly ob appointment and bi-weekly peri appointment and ultrasound. Once I hit this stage with Samantha it felt like I was constantly going to the doctors, it felt like time flew. We really should decide on a name (don't worry, there is an app for that and I did download it). Then start going through baby things. All we really need to get is a car seat and double stroller and I am so torn on strollers. I finally found a single stroller I am in love with and I've been trying those out since Kaitlyn was a toddler! Obviously, we have plenty of girl things lol.

I had every intention of taking a first belly pic today. Then, we were running late. Then, it was hot, then I forgot to take my Zantac and was miserable. Then the ac went out at home and I was more miserable, swollen and gross. So, I'm shooting for tomorrow.

Today, Dusty and I celebrated our 8 year anniversary. We were so naive and innocent then. A few days before, we were hit by a drunk driver and I spent some time in labor and delivery being monitored for contractions. I was just shy of 27 weeks pregnant. They went away on their own. That was the closest we had ever been to something in our lives being not ok. Since then, we've had a little girl, buried a son after a high risk pregnancy, hospital bed rest and a premature delivery, experienced 3 miscarriages, welcomed another little girl and are dealing with another high risk pregnancy. And everything in between. We may not always enjoy the same movies, or agree on every tiny detail, and we've both rolled our eyes a time or two, but on all the medium and big things, we see eye to eye, we laugh at the same stupid jokes, enjoy the same immature cartoons, put our family first and are there when it really matters. There isn't anyone else I could have survived the last 5 years with or would want to envision the rest of my life with.

20 weeks down, 19 weeks and 3 days left until an eternity with our family complete.

Monday, August 6, 2012

Happy 5th birthday Matthew

Today is Matthew's 5th birthday. He should be running around, jumping, creating havoc, and enjoying cupcakes for breakfast. Instead, he will forever be our teeny tiny little baby boy.

The 5th birthday is a big milestone to me. It's the year little ones start kindergarten, stop being preschoolers and become official "big kids." It's the last year you are likely sure that they will keep their cute little baby teeth, and the last year they can use one hand to show "how many" they are.

This year, Matthew does not get to pick out a backpack and lunch box. He doesn't get to go the school' ice cream social and find out who his teacher is or where his classroom is. just as he didn't get to celebrate his first through fourth birthdays with us, he simply isn't here on Earth to celebrate his 5th. To us, he will always be a 10 lb stinker in tiny clothes who we make silly faces and sounds at to try and get a peek at a smile.

This year, our family will continue to miss him as we celebrate another birthday without him, as we welcome another sister without him and as we prepare for another Christmas without him.

His life was far too short, but rich in love. He is forever a big part of our family, forever missed and forever loved. While I trade anything in the world to have him here with us, I am so incredibly thankful for the precious time we ad with our little miracle.

Friday, July 27, 2012

Chick-Fil-A

I love Chick-Fil-A. I love their food, their iced tea, how friendly the employees are to kids, the positive they bring to a community and how the treat their employees.

I support marriage. Not just traditional marriage. I support two consenting adults deciding they want to be married and doing so. I support staying married. I support strong families. I do not think the government should be in the business of handling marriage. Be it a man and a woman, two women or two men, I believe the government should issue civil unions and marriages should be left between the couple and their church or their God. End of story.

But, the government insists on not only handling marriages but also insists that they know what is best for everyone in the country and actually have the audacity to decide who can and who cannot be married. How is it any if their business who you decide to share eternity with?

Freedom of speech is one of the amendments that makes the US great. And everyone supports that freedom, until they hear something you don't want to hear.

Recently a fire storm of news reports came out accusing CFA of being "anti-gay" because of how the CEO chose to spend some of their funds. While it is my personal belief that it is bad for businesses to get involved with politics, they have that right. And, there are consequences to that right.

As a consumer, you have the right to spend your money where you chose and if you feel that a company is spending it's profits in a way you disagree with, you should consider not patronizing that establishment. But, you should do it based on facts. The fact is, CFA isn't anti-gay. They proudly employee and serve all people, regardless of their race, sex, gender, sexual orientation, marital status and so on.

Personally, I find the Boy Scouts and their recent actions far more offensive. Locally, a man was terminated from camp, without a single previous infraction against him, who was loved by those that attended, after he came out of the closet. He had been a lifelong boy scout. Several other employees made the choice to walk out with him. Good for them I say.

When it comes down to it, as individuals, we have the right to boycott wherever we want to for whatever reason we find important to us. Local government does not have the right to interfere with businesses because of the practices they support with their own profits. I'm sure that if a town had a mayor that was very "anti-gay marriage" and forbid Starbucks from doing business in the local limits because of how they spend their dollars we'd all be in an uproar about it!

I also believe it is really important to look at a company as a whole. CFA has regularly been the first to respond to tragedies by feed first responders, those who have had natural disasters wipe out their entire towns and so on. They don't respond with just money, they physically show up with hot food, prayers, good thoughts and warm wishes. I wish more companies did that.

Samantha's Disimpaction

Nothing about that title sounds fun. And it isn't.

For Samantha's procedure, she had a 2 day prep time. Wednesday she had her "last meal" before it was time for the first treatment of magnesium citrate to try and loosen things up. Wednesday was easy.

Thursday was pure torture. Thursday was a "Clear Liquid Diet" day. Guess who did not like this? She did awesome until about 12:30. Once it was time for lunch, she wanted NOTHING to do with jello or juice. She wanted milk, cheese, pickles, anything. She cried. And cried. And threw jello. And threw a Popsicle. And knocked over some chicken broth. And cried.

I ended up basically holding her until 4:30 while she cried that she was hungry. We watched Cailou. I couldn't eat anything, obviously, put her down to use the restroom, help Kaitlyn get ready or accomplish the things I wanted to do. By 5, it was time to take Kaitlyn to cheer. Samantha was starting to fall asleep in the car, so after we dropped Kaitlyn off, I drove her around to get gas so we wouldn't have to do it this morning, and as soon as she fell asleep I took my butt to Taco Bell and scarfed down some food as she slept.

We went to pick Kaitlyn up at cheer and got there a few minutes early. I was hoping she would stay asleep, but she had other plans. She woke up as soon as I stopped the car. She cried. She kept saying she was hungry. It was heartbreaking. There wasn't anything I could do but offer the things she did not want. A little girl watching her brother practice called her crying annoying. I may have shot her a look.

After practice, and Kaitlyn finding out she made the team, we headed to Dusty's parents to drop Kaitlyn off. The surgery center asks that you not bring siblings, and considering that we had to be there by 6 and it took both of us to help Samantha, it worked out best that she had a sleepover with her cousin at her Nana and Papa's house.

Samantha cried the whole way home. She basically cried until she went to sleep at 11:30. It was exhausting for all of us.

As soon as she was asleep, I fell asleep. I was beyond tired. It was an emotionally and physically draining day. Not too long after that, Dusty came into the bedroom and the smell woke me up. Archie and Chico were hard at work protecting the yard when they cornered an animal. Chico won't back down from a fight and a skunk is no exception. It didn't end well for our stinky dogs. The smell just from Dusty touching them was horrific.

This morning started with a nice 4:30 AM shower. By 5:30, Samantha was up (on her own) and calling for Mommy, Mommy, Help! I grabbed her and headed to the car. I must have somehow forgotten that we have steps at our front door, missed them and fell on my ankle. Not a good way to start the day.

We arrived at the valet parking right at 6, went inside and wandered around until we found where we should be. Samantha was in a great mood. She loved the kids waiting area, there were fishies painted on the wall and cartoons on the TV. She was not at all thrilled when we were called back into the prep area. We met her nurse. Samantha still wasn't happy. They had a bed set up for her with toys, dolls, books and a special pillow case.

She wouldn't let the nurse do anything really. She was on high alert the entire time. She didn't want her vitals taken, she didn't want to wear the arm band, she didn't want the nurse to even look in her direction. I was ok with the nurse, she was trying really hard and very genuine, until she was explaining the medication they would use for her to "sleep" with and followed up the name by whispering, "you know, the stuff Michael Jackson used." Totally did not need that visual.

When it came time for her IV, they decided to wheel her next to the procedure room so she wouldn't upset the kid next to us.

I suggested using the left arm. She's given blood there before and it went really well. They decided to use the right. I laid on the bed, her on top of me, Dusty and another nurse distracting her with bubbles and songs, and the nurse mentioned above completely blowing her vein as Samantha watched it swell in her arm.

She screamed. Loudly. Passionately. There was no way in hell she was going to let anyone else get close to her. The incredibly kind anesthesiologist came in and told us she wasn't going to let it happen that way again. We could go into the procedure room with Samantha, hold her and she would put in the IV and then immediately administer the medication. She would fall asleep in 30 seconds and hopefully not remember it at all.

This time, Dusty held her. Distraction was not an option and there was no way I could control her this time with a belly in the way, not with how she was fighting it.

They tried her right hand. Blew the vein. Blood was everywhere. They tried again, she was asleep about 15 seconds later. We kissed her as she slept and went to the waiting area.

About 15 minutes later, the doctor came out. She had pictures from the colonoscopy for us to keep as souvenirs. (yuck) Her exact words were: "There was a lot of poop. A lot. of. poop." We were worried that because of her x-rays and symptoms that she just had one main "piece" of impacted stool, it would be broken down and removed. BUT, it would also mean that the colon would be stretched out and take time to get back to normal. Fortunately for her, it was not just one piece, it was spread out through the colon. Which means that while the first 24 hours of recovery are tougher, there is more gas, cramping and overall fussiness, BUT, it also means that her colon is perfect. No stretching, no wider spots, nothing to heal, perfectly healthy. We have the before and after pictures to prove it.

We immediately went to be next to Samantha, who was sleeping better than she probably has since birth. It took about 15 minutes for her to start to wake up, she wanted daddy. And she heard the words juice and crackers. She absolutely wanted those. She drank 2 juice boxes before we left 10 minutes later and 2 packs of crackers were demolished. On the way home, she wanted french fries. The fact that it was only 9 AM was not a reason in her mind not to go. Luckily, Jack in the Box serves lunch all day.

Most of the day has been going back and forth between being super happy, eating, drinking, playing, laughing at the dogs taking baths, annoyed, sleepy, hyper and everything in between. By tomorrow, they say she should be an entirely different kid. She was down to 23 lbs today, (10th percentile) so hopefully she'll start packing those pounds on.

We will continue with miralax for probably another 6 months so she gets used to her stools being soft and comfortable. After that we would have the go ahead to start potty training if we chose. It is not at all advised to start before then and could cause another blockage. We may even wait until she's nearly 3 based on the new research that has come out encouraging postponing.

I'm beyond ready for bed, the dogs are bathed and the stinky skunk smell is out of the house. Yay!

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Adios Summer

This is how I feel.

School starts back on August 9. August 7 is the welcome back ice cream social. Between now and then, I feel like we have a gazillion things to do before then and it's going to be here tomorrow.

Kaitlyn had her yearly eye exam today. Her initial tests showed perfect vision. No problems or hesitations. We talked some about her headaches and he suggested a different type of dilation. It doesn't wear off as easily as what they have used before, but it's more effective. After dilation, her vision was not so perfect and showed an underlying prescription.

She needed a 1.75+ prescription. However, her eyes are working hard to give her perfect vision, and we want to try and keep them trying to correct her vision in hoping it will eventually correct itself. So, we are going to do a prescription that isn't quite as strong, and only use it for reading and homework or classwork. After a year, we'll reevaluate. Unless, she keeps getting migraines and then we'll see what works for her.

Tomorrow is not going to be a fun day around here. Samantha wakes up begging for two things, milk and poptarts. Poptarts can usually be traded out for cereal, oatmeal, bagels, toast or anything and I think poptarts is just her word for breakfast.

Because she is having her fecal disimpaction on Friday, tomorrow is a clear fluid only day. All day. Only jello, juice, water and broth. She is NOT going to like it. I can easily say she is going to hate it. We're going to try and go in the morning for me to finish up some work and Kaitlyn to pick out her glasses, but I'm not going to hold my breath. Kaitlyn has her last day of cheer camp tomorrow night as well. AND, it's when she finds out if she made the team.

Friday, we need to have Samantha at the hospital by 6 AM for check-in with a 7:30 procedure. We should hopefully be on our way home by 11. Hopefully she does well with the anesthesia and bounces back easily.

Saturday is uniform fitting for Kaitlyn if she made the team. Her fingers are crossed!

Next week is our last week to catch up with friends before her last weekend before school. Kaitlyn REALLY wants to do the color run with my sisters on Saturday and Sunday we are celebrating Matthew's fifth birthday. How he would already be 5 is beyond me and I'm sure I'll share all my feelings soon.

Tuesday is our anniversary and next big ultrasound, followed by ice cream night. Wednesday is manicures and pedicures and the last night of freedom before getting back to the the school schedule.

Kaitlyn has all her new clothes and shoes, back pack and lunch box and desperately wants her glasses to be here before she starts school.

Can you believe there is exactly 5 months left until Christmas!?!?!

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

18 weeks pregnant

"Nothing worth having is easy."

Ain't that the truth!

In just a couple weeks, we will be halfway to our due date. It feels like time is both racing by and going at the slowest possible rate. This is easily the hardest pregnancy I've had. Yes, even compared to Matthew. At least I had the ability to be naive, and there was only a week or two where I worried about whether or not I would get to viability. And, there was only one pregnancy complication that I had to deal with.

This time, it seems like it's one thing after another. I'm much more tired, I have a hard time feeling a lot of kicks, which leads me to believe that the stubborn placenta has not shifted as the uterus grows. I'm dizzy all the time, still battling nausea every day and I seriously have reflux so bad that it makes me dread eating.

But, in 5 months, I'm going to wonder how it could have went so fast. I'm going to look back and thing "it wasn't that bad." And I'm going to marvel over a little princess.

Samantha on the other hand, I'm not sure how she is going to handle it. Her and Kaitlyn both show a lot of tendencies of jealousy when it comes to one getting attention, even if it's just from Archie or Chico. At least Kaitlyn is old enough to have a discussion with and reason with.

We have nearly everything we need for the baby already. Our shopping list is pretty short. In the next couple weeks (probably after Kaitlyn goes back to school) I am going to go and test drive some double strollers. I know it's going to be hard. I finally found the absolutely perfect single stroller for our family and I know there isn't a chance in the world I'll find a double stroller that is so light and easy to steer. I've started gathering things I need to work on the projects I'm going to make for her. If I gather enough energy, I might even include photos and tutorials as I work on them. ;)

I haven't taken a single belly shot. But, I feel like I look ginormous. I figure I'll start them in a couple weeks. :)

Until then, only 2 more weeks until our next Ultrasound. Only 149 days until the last possible day we'll deliver (39w3d, December 21), 152 days until we hopefully bring her home (I'm hoping for quick recovery and going home on Christmas Eve!), and 153 days until Christmas and her due date!