Only 4 months until Christmas!

And 5 days.

Which means that this little princess is 8 months old.

Charlotte has grown so much in the last month.  I haven't weighed her or measured her yet, but there is absolutely no question that she's gone through a growth spurt.

But, she's also grown in other ways.  She has such a personality.  She is incredibly outgoing but likes to play shy.  She does not like to see anyone upset, but laughs when she hears someone else giggle.  She is curious about everything going on around her.  She is quick to smile, quicker to stick out her tongue and goes to just about anyone these days.  And she does the cutest little thing with her nose.  It gets crinkled all the time.  I love it.

She is crawling so fast and getting into just about everything lately.  She loves to be in the kitchen.  It's the best place to open drawers and cupboards.  She loves to get out all the sippy cups and play with the lids.  She's just so fast, and wants to be where the action is. 

Charlotte is anxious to stand up.  If she's in her bassinet (I know we need to move her, more on that in a moment) she can put her hands on my nightstand and then pull herself to stand.  But, her body is more like a triangle.  She spends a lot of time pulling herself to her knees and grabbing onto anything to pull herself up to stand.  If we help her up to stand, she'll stand for a really long time.  Like minutes.  If we hold her hands, she'll make a lot of stepping motions to get where she wants.  She's so excited about every single movement.

She loves to be picked up and reaches her arms out to you and waves her little hand towards you like, please let me love on you.  And when you pick her up, she will love on you.  She will turn her head into your chest.  She will give you wide open mouth kisses.  She will just love you.  It's the sweetest thing.

She is babbling a lot and can say mama, but I don't count it yet.  If you ask her where mama is or dada, or Kaitlyn or Samantha or bottle, she knows.  There are actually a lot of words she understands.  She loves the dogs, is just absolutely crazy about Archie. 

A few things about Charlotte this month:
           * She is clapping
           * She dances to music
           * She loves having a blanket.  All the time.
           * She still has 2 teeth!!  She was the earliest to get them, but the slowest to get more...
           * She still loves the paci.  The only baby to go past 6 months with them.
           * When she wears disposable diapers, she's a size 3; in cloth, she's in the middle rise
           * She is wearing a 6-12 month in clothes.  She hasn't really worn shoes yet...
           * She is sleeping through the night.  Kinda.  She sleeps from 9 p.m. to 2:30 a.m. and 3 to 7
           * She nurses every 2-3 hours day, has baby food 3 times a day, loves puffs and       
              gets 6 oz of formula at night.
           * We have been very slowly adding in table foods.  So far she has had watermelon, mashed
               potatoes and bananas.

I have so many things to write about.  I'm going to work on them tomorrow.  Some things I'm working on:

* Being catfished again!  And this time I have texts and emails to share.  ;) And why I ended up deleting 300 facebook friends...
* Kaitlyn's second year in cheer!
* Kaitlyn starting the 4th grade!
* Samantha potty training and all the hysterical things she says
* The miraculous recovery of Archie
* Our new daily schedule.  What it's like with having my 4 month old nephew here 4 days a week!

A 6th Birthday

Today is the 6th birthday of a very special little boy.

A boy born crying and kicking with a head full of dark, silky hair.

A little one at just under 5 lbs, with quizzical blue eyes and long, skinny fingers he just couldn't keep out of his mouth.

Today is the 6th birthday of a special little prince who changed our worlds.  Who taught us all about faith, determination and strength. 

6 years ago today, after 10 weeks on hospital bed rest, after 10 weeks of having such a limited amount of amniotic fluid surrounding him, Matthew was born.

When he wanted out, he wanted out.  He did not show the same patience and restraint he had the weeks leading up to his birth.  My contractions started around 1 in the morning, by 3:30, I was fully dilated and he did not care one bit that he was bottom first, he was going to descend all on his own, if I wasn't going to push.  By 4:30 a.m., mere moments after reaching the operating room and finding an OB (who just happened to be mine!) on the stroll down, he was born.  He cried.  He was shown to me over the curtain and he was quickly whisked away to the NICU.

And so started our roller coaster.

26 days in the NICU.  A place we called home.  The place where he met his big sister.

The place we spent our spare time.  The first place I held him, 5 days after he was born.  The place where he had his first baths, his first bottles, his first change of clothes, his first ultrasounds, so many of the only firsts he would ever have were here.

The following 44 days of his life were spent at home.  Reading stories with his big sister.

Being cuddled.

Being photographed.

Going to the park.

Meeting family. 

Taking baths.

Getting Spoiled.

And then one day, the morning after this picture was taken, it was over. 

There would be no more of that.  There wouldn't be anymore memories created or shared.  There would be a dark spot where he should be.

6 years can be so long and so short all at once.  Today, Matthew is turning 6.  His golden birthday.  There are so many things we should be doing.  So many things I wonder.

Would he like his birthday pancakes plain like Kaitlyn or filled with chocolate chips and doused in whipped cream and sprinkles like Samantha?  Where would he want to spend the day?  Would he chose to go to Chuck E. Cheese, or take advantage of a rare beautiful day in August by going to the zoo?  Would he want pizza for lunch or chicken McNuggets?  What would he chose for dinner?  What kind of cake would he like?  Or would he want pie instead?

There are so many things about him we never had the opportunity to learn.  To know.  So many things that we take for granted.  So many things I wish we could be doing with him.  So many experiences we would have had together.

I walked by Kaitlyn's room last night.  She had built a big bed on the floor and her and Samantha were watching Looney Tunes together.  Charlotte had already gone to sleep for the night.  And it was hard to realize there should have been a little boy under there, on his birthday eve, too excited to sleep knowing there would be presents.

But, he wasn't.

Instead, we carry him in our hearts.  We honor him in our actions.  We celebrate his life, no matter how short it was.

7 months old

The two weeks leading up to Charlotte turning 7 months (so, about 3 weeks ago since I'm a total slacker this month!), Charlotte woke up so grown up.

 She decided that she no longer wanted to crawl like a frog.  It started with getting her knees up for 2-3 crawls, then flopping on her belly.  Then, an hour later, it would be 4-5 crawls on her knees, then another hour would pass and she would get halfway across the room.  By July 1st, she was officially crawling.  Everywhere.  Without flopping.  So cute.  So fast.  So not ready for it.  And she's so proud of herself.  She'll be crawling and look behind to give you this shy, sweet little smile.  Of course, now she doesn't like to be held nearly as much.

When Charlotte wants to pick something up on the ground, she rocks on her knees, almost to judge where she should stop, to be in a good place.  Then, she flops herself down to get it.  So stinkin' cute.

The next morning, she had 2 bottom teeth.  She's the youngest of the girls to have had teeth break through, so I was shocked.  And, although it was a couple of days where she fussed a bit, she was actually pretty darn good through them cutting.  She continued sleeping through the night, and would just want to chew on everything.  Really, we were pretty lucky.  Knock on wood.  Hopefully it continues.

Since then, Charlotte has started sitting on her own.  Not just sitting, she goes from crawling, to a sitting position, and from sitting to crawling.  Or to her tummy, or her back.  I remember Kaitlyn and Samantha both having a lot more time crawling under their belt before accomplishing the transitions.  Of course, they both sat on their own earlier too..

She loves pulling herself up.  She can get onto her knees and sit up fully without support, but she likes to use the couch, table, our legs or anything else to get as high as possible.  It'll only be a matter of time before she is standing.  Then walking.  It feels like time is going by so fast.  Someone asked me the other day how old she was and I found myself nearly saying 4 months.  7 months is just so close to 1.  And so close to not being a baby.

Charlotte is a wonderful eater.  She is still nursing every 2 hours through the day, finishing off 2 stage 3 jars of food a day, plus 6 oz of formula before bed every night.  She's still pretty petite though.  Just hitting 16 lbs (26%), but so long.  28 inches (92%).  So far, she loves it all.  Except things tomato based.  Which kinda shocks me.  Especially considering how the girls are. 

Charlotte is a cuddly, loving and nosy little girl.  She loves being in the middle of everything and does not like to be left out of the playing.  She doesn't like Daddy and her sisters rough housing, it makes her lip quiver.  She cracks up at Kaitlyn and Samantha both and is so spoiled by those girls.  She has an amazing personality and squishes up her little nose and does all sorts of funny things with her eyebrows and lips.  She is pretty happy most of the time.  As long as she isn't in the car.  She absolutely despises the car.

Our little red headed, blue eyed little princess is growing before our eyes.  She is loved, adored and treasured beyond measure.

Charlotte's hip ultrasound is tomorrow (Monday, July 29th), so think happy thoughts.  I'm fairly positive it will come back normal, and they ended up cancelling her appointment last week to make it with a specialist, so I'm confident we will have answers tomorrow.

Summer Camp

When I was younger, I went to summer camp once as a camper.  I was 12.  I think.  If I remember correctly.  It was a 4-H camp.  I remember making so many friends and having so much fun.  I also remember being incredibly nervous, excited, homesick and wondering what in the world I was even doing there. 

In the years that followed, I was a camp counselor for the West Sacramento Kiwanis camp.  A week away.  A week with 9 - 11 year old campers who were experiencing a lot of what I was feeling once upon a time.  It was so much fun.  It was also hot, dirty, memorable and a special opportunity.

For as long as I can remember, my grandma has helped run Kiwanis camp.  It's just one of those things that she's done. 50 kids go.  Half boys and half girls.  Teens are counselors and adults are staff.  They are broken down into groups of 5.  They hike, camp, fish, explore, learn important skills, sing silly campfire songs and make life long friends.

This year, Kaitlyn asked to go to camp.  Kiwanis camp.  For an entire week, a 2 hour drive away.  Holy moly.  That's a long time.  And with limited cell service with my grandma, and kids not allowed to bring electronics, it feels like forever since we've talked to her.  Instead, it was Sunday afternoon.  About an hour after she left, I told Dusty that I wish I would have told her no.

For all of her attitude, dramatics and inability to listen, she's also hysterically funny, insanely helpful and one of my most favorite people.

On Sunday, Kaitlyn took her own (huge) duffel bag to the bus and helped her daddy load it on.  She found a friend to sit with after they loaded up, and she waved good-bye as her 2 year old sister cried hysterically for several minutes.  I worry that she's not having fun, that she misses us too much, that she's not making friends, that there are too many mosquitoes, that she isn't eating or brushing her teeth.  I worry that she is just absolutely miserable and wishes we would just come and rescue her.

But, this is Kaitlyn.  She misses us at night I'm sure.  But, just for a little bit before falling asleep.  Kaitlyn is making friends and making memories.  And on Wednesday we will sneak away for a couple hours and surprise her.  And it will be hard for me not to snatch her away and force her to come home with us.

6 month appointment

This morning, Charlotte had her 6 month appointment.  I usually try to do it right on the day they turn that age, but she was late on her 4 month one because of scheduling, which pushed them all back.  I hate it.

At 6 months, they measured Charlotte at 26.75 inches (which I think was off , way too short), 15 lbs and 12 ounces and a 42 cm head circumference.

The appointment was going fairly well.  Samantha kept insisting it was her turn to get a check-up and Charlotte was acting as though she'd be thrilled to switch places.  Her heart murmur is still there, which we expected.  She's showing some growth from her last visit.  She's hitting all of her milestones and then some.  (She's finally sitting up on her own in a steady fashion)  And then it came time for her hips to be checked.

That did not go so well.

Her doctor thinks that Charlotte might have an issue with her hips.  She said there's a possibility that her hip is not properly in the socket and that her left leg appears to be a tiny bit shorter than the right.  There's no way to know for sure without an ultrasound and the earliest we can get in is July 24th.  So, July 24th it is...

The rest of her appointment involved her vaccines, and Samantha still wanting her turn.  If only it were time for flu shots, it would have worked out perfectly!

Since vaccines, we've been nursing away a low grade fever and playing with a baby who goes back and forth between pure joy and pure misery.

Here's hoping tomorrow is a better day and the doctor is beyond wrong about her poor little hips.

Charlotte is 6 months old!

And I'm a week behind!  Which I am not at all proud of!  But, we were enjoying the summer in Santa Cruz and I came back to something yucky going on in my tummy.

Charlotte is growing at an insane rate.  She's definitely not a newborn anymore.  I don't even know where to begin when it comes to her rapid development.

Much to my surprise, Charlotte still has all of her hair.  After all of our time in the sun, and despite spraying the sun screen into her hair, it has a lot of gold in it.  She's finally starting to get some fat rolls on her legs and her cheeks and chin are starting to look chunky.  I love chunky babies.  And really, she eats enough where she should be nothing but rolls.

Charlotte is nursing every 2 hours during the day.  Before bed (around 8:30) she eats 2 ounces of formula after nursing.  Then, she sleeps until 5 in the morning most days.  For some reason, if I skip that 2 ounces, she will be up every 2 hours at night.  I know formula has nothing to do with sleeping through the night, but I swear she knows the difference.  In the morning she eats about 4 ounces of baby food and another 4 ounces in the evening.  Unlike Samantha, she is not a picky baby at all.  She'll use any type of bottle/nipple and eat any kind of baby food.  She does absolutely love melons in her little mesh feeder.

With Samantha, we didn't use baby food because she hated it.  We did baby led weaning and she would just eat food.  She was about the same age and eating teething biscuits and whatever was on our plate.  Charlotte does not like solid food in the same way.  I've given her the baby rice cups and she has no interest in doing anything other than shoving them between her toes...

Charlotte has started to HATE the car.  If we time it right at nap time, she'll sleep in there.  Otherwise, nothing will make her happy.  She's already weaning herself off the paci and chewing it instead of sucking (unless she is super tired) so that's not much help, toys do not interest her at all in the car and basically we just have to try and get wherever we are going.  This means Kaitlyn has been our best in the car baby by far.

Charlotte also does not like for me to leave her.  At all.  For any length of time.  She's better if she's at home, but we have tried going out to dinner and letting her stay with grandparents and it was horrible for her.  She just cried and cried.  She is so stubborn, she will not cry herself to sleep in any situation, she will just cry for hours on end if she doesn't get her way...  This could be trouble later...

Charlotte wears disposable diapers when we travel (size 2 pampers swaddlers) and cloth at home.  Once we run out of disposable, we'll hopefully be rid of them for a good long while!  She's outgrowing her 3-6 month clothes, but some still fit.  She wears a lot of 6-9 month stuff, but the waist is so narrow on some of the things.

Charlotte is currently (unofficially until Monday the 8th of July) 28 1/4" long (98.9%) and 15 lbs (27% and not even double her birth weight yet).

She is so close to crawling it's ridiculous.  She gets on all fours and pushes herself front and back and then usually either goes backwards or falls on her face.  She is able to quickly go from one side of the room to another, scooting or rolling.  She isn't sitting up on her own too well yet.  She can tripod for a minute or so, but isn't too secure...  She has a million looks she likes to give and such a fun personality.  Kaitlyn and Samantha can really get her laughing and playing.

The Story of Chico

By 2009, Kaitlyn really wanted a sibling.  She asked for another baby pretty much every day.  She turned 5 that year and was absolutely obsessed.  By Christmas, I'd experienced 3 miscarriages and I was starting to accept that it just wasn't going to happen.  A few days after Christmas, Dusty's uncle was visiting and brought the cutest, tiniest puppy in the world with him.

He was only a few weeks old.  He was the runt.  His mom had killed all the siblings and he only survived because he was tiny enough to hide behind a hot water heater.  He had been bottle fed and was just so tiny with such a massive head.  His head was so heavy, when he bent down to eat, his feet would go in the air.

Kaitlyn begged for him.  I begged too.  Dusty was pretty strong about saying no, reminding us that we didn't need another dog, and reminding me of the cons of another dog right then.  But, he quickly gave in.

His name was Chico.  I don't know if Archie was more irritated when we brought home Chico or a baby...  But, I thought Chico would help keep Archie active and young longer.  Makes sense, right?

I took Chico with me everywhere.  He was so tiny and so cuddly and I was so scared to leave him.  After we had him for a few months, we found out I was pregnant with Samantha.  I took Chico pretty much everywhere with me until Samantha was born.  By then, he was 10 lbs, neutered and good at being left at home.

Chico is such an interesting looking dog.  He has a severe underbite, so bad the vet asked if we wanted to get him braces.  Since he has no problem eating, it would be $5,000 (or so) for a cosmetic procedure.  He has "bat" ears, squinty eyes and a muscular chest.  He is part chihuahua and part pit bull.  He is amazing with kids and not always the brightest crayon in the box...

We were out of town for about a week earlier this month.  We had a family member house sit and watch the dogs.  Normally, we just have a family member check on them, but Archie is getting old and having a hard time getting in and out of the doggie door, so this made way more sense.  And we were so grateful.

Chico decided to get out of the backyard while we were gone.  We figured it out when we returned.  Somehow, it went unnoticed, which can be easy to do since sometimes Archie barks enough for both of them and will absolutely devour Chico's food if given the chance.

At first, I figured he was in the field behind our house.  He had gotten out there before, but always came back.  We searched and searched.  He wasn't there.  I whistled for him and called his name and nothing.  We went to the neighbors.  No one had seen him.  The man next door that just moved in said he hadn't barked at him in 2-3 days.

Within a couple hours we had posted 25 flyers in the area.  We had talked to everyone whose house touched ours or the field behind ours.  Dusty did most of the talking.  We walked through that awful field over and over again.

One man said he saw him on Saturday running away from the field.  A few other men said they saw a group of pitbulls around the area.  We hoped and prayed that he was just ok.  I put ads on facebook, with the pounds and shelters and on craigslist.

The next morning, I was browsing craigslist and came across an ad of a dog that looked like Chico.

They found him on Friday night, in the direction he was last seen running.  I called their number.  I emailed them.  I text them.  I didn't hear back.  I did it all over and over again.  A few hours later they called.

They said he had been picked up by his family.  I asked if they were sure because that looks so much like our dog.  She said "they fell in love with him" and she had no way of proving it.  But, if I called her back that night when she got home, she would give me their information.

I called her at the time she said.  No answer.  I text.  I left messaged.  I called again.  And again.  And again.  She finally called back and said she wasn't home, but she talked to them and they admitted it wasn't their dog.  They were taking him back to her and we could pick him up.  She would call when he arrived.

That was at 8:30 p.m.  By 10:30 p.m.  We hadn't heard anything. So, I text.  No response.

The next morning I called.  Again and again and again.  Nothing.  Around noon, she text they were bringing him by at 2 and we could get him then.  I responded asking her for her address.  I heard nothing.  2 came and went without a phone call or text.  I emailed, I called, and called and called.

We were getting frustrated, upset, irritated, angry.  I called the police who said it was a civil matter.  I couldn't understand why she didn't just call back to give us an idea of what was going on?

I started calling every 20 minutes.  At nearly 7, my phone rang.  It was a friendly voice, a different one explaining that she had our dog.

Chico had found his way into the garage of her mother-in-law, the woman who posted the ad.  The kids saw him the next morning and fell in love with him.  They took him home to their 4 year old son and 2 year old daughter.  They named him Turbo.  They bought him toys and specialty food and gave him a bath.  The didn't know his family was looking for him.  They didn't know there was a craigslist ad.  They didn't know he was microchipped.

Dusty and Kaitlyn picked him up.  The little boy was upset.  Kaitlyn was happy.  Samantha was beyond thrilled.  And it was bittersweet.  I felt for them, they had a few days to grow attached to "Turbo" and fill the void left by their dog that ran away and never came back.  They didn't expect him to be "found."

Chico is home where he belongs and I sincerely hope that little boy has a puppy of his own to love and grow up with.