04/04/07

The Joys of Motherhood

There are many things about having a child that are incredibly difficult. You rarely have a moment to yourself, you are up through the night quite often, you have to completely care for another person, you have back aches from lugging around a 30 pound toddler, you get to hear some whining, some screaming, some crying all because the Sponge Bob movie is over, you work incredibly hard to be a good mom.

But, being a mom has so many rewards! All of the hard work in the world is worth Kaitlyn calling me mommy. Everything is worth Kaitlyn giving me kisses and saying "wuv you" and hearing her giggle when she thinks she is going to tickle me. Those are joys I get to experiance every day!!

In addition to that, we get to help her explore the big world around us. We get to help her feed giraffe's, ride elephants, see new animals, ride on amusement park rides and enjoy so many new experiances. I wouldn't miss out on those for anything in the whole world! They are pure magic.

This year we get to introduce Kaitlyn to so many of her favorite characters! After Labor Day, Kaitlyn gets to meet Thomas the Train and all of his friends!! In mid-June or Early July Kaitlyn gets to meet Sponge Bob!! She's going to love that!! And, it looks like we just might be heading to Disneyland at the end of August where Kaitlyn can meet all her favorites: Dumbo, The Little Mermaid, lady and the Tramp, Monsters and even Nemo will be there!! I am so excited!!

My point is, Kaitlyn can be a lot of work, but the fun of toddlerhood and the magic on a child's face makes it all worth while.

04/3/07

Just how we're doing...

Let me tell ya, working from home, with a toddler, managing an apartment complex, keeping a clean house, taking care of a high maintenance dog AND being pregnant has not been easy.

Being sick the first 14 weeks didn't help either!Here I am, 15 weeks and 2 days. I'm feeling much better. During the day, I have way more energy than I did last month, which is wonderful. MOST of the morning sickness is gone. I have a couple waves in the morning where I think I am going to be praying to the porcelain gods, but with some deep breaths and cool surroundings, it typically passes pretty quickly.

I have been getting migraines at night the last two nights, but I am sure that my doctor will take care of that at my appointment next Wednesday.

This week, my goal has been to get things done! I chose a bad week because it is rent paying week which means that people are in and out all day long, but I can do it. I am nearly all caught up on all my housework. That has truly suffered in the past weeks and while Dusty has been great, there is only so much he can or will do. All I have to do to get things back in line is 2 more loads of laundry and a run through all the rooms with the Magic Eraser to get rid of our little Picasso's master pieces. That has made me feel so good. I've had all the windows and doors open so fresh air can saturate everything we have and will probably have the carpet cleaners come in Friday to deep clean all of our carpets, yippee!!

We're basically staying busy. Here are some new pics from the past couple of weeks :)

03/19/07

Has caused me to have a newfound respect and amazement towards mothers with more than one child.

Everything is different with a second baby than with a first. With your first child, everything is so new, you have no idea what to expect, you worry about everything you feel and you spend a lot of time daydreaming about your little one.

With your second pregnancy, you know a lot of what to expect. You know that those pains in your belly are normal, you know that the sickness will end, you know that time that feels like it is slowly passing will all of a sudden fly by.

I remember the best thing anyone ever said to me when I was pregnant with Kaitlyn. It was an on call OB/GYN in the labor and delivery department when I was pregnant with Kaitlyn. I had a terrible migraine and couldn't stop throwing up. She told me "no one ever said pregnancy was easy, you're creating a new life and that is hard work."

I guess, until then, I had never thought of it that way. Pregnancy was always this event in a woman's life that looked so miraculous and amazing. I never let the thought enter my mind that pregnancy could equal 40 weeks of misery followed by 6-8 weeks of recovery and not sleeping.

My pregnancy with Kaitlyn wasn't easy. It wasn't terrible, but it was hard. I ws sick for the first six months and lost 13 pounds in my first trimester, I had constant migraines, and terrible back pain from my uterus being so tipped. It was also a stressful pregnancy, I had a wedding to plan, a baby to prepare for, had to deal with the constant negativity of others, were in a car accident, and I thought I was going to be pregnant forever.

When I was pregnant with Kaitlyn, I wasn't working. I had a knee injury that prevented me from doing even the simpliest of tasks. That allowed me to rest as often as possible, and I took advantage of that. It also allowed me plenty of oppurtunities to take a browse through Babies R Us, or the mall every day. I got a lot of walking in.

This pregnancy hasn't been easy. I'm not nearly as sick, but I'm exhausted. I'm ready for bed every night at 7. I get so sick at the same time that it's nearly impossible for me to eat after 6. I already have braxton hicks all the time and terrible heartburn. I get heartburn even with water, it's terrible! And my uterus is tipped so far back that my back is in constant pain.

I don't get to rest as much. I am a full-time stay at home mom with a full time job. I stay pretty darned busy. I have a house to keep clean, a toddler that is very demanding, a doggie that requires a ton of attention and an apartment complex full of people that demand my attention at all hours of the day or night.

When I was pregnant with Kaitlyn, I learned something so valuable that I don't think a lot of people realize or want to realize. The second that pregnancy test is positive, you are a mommy. That blob of cells in you is a baby, it's your baby. You love that baby so much from that first instant.

For the father, it isn't that cut and dry. The baby isn't in them. They cannot feel the baby, their bodies do not change, they do not feel pregnant all they see is a stick with pee on it that changes their lives.

For Dusty, even the first sonogram pictures aren't necessarily a bonding experiance. I don't necessarily see why they would be though. Really, it's a picture of a lima bean in some water. There are not any distinguishing features at all. But, when he sees the sonogram pictures that show his son, and his head, and his eyes and his hands and itty bitty feet, he realizes that it is a baby, his baby that he loves and then, the world changes.

I am incredibly thank ful for Dusty. I truly am. Dusty and I have only been married for 2 1/2 years. We've been together for nearly 8 and lived together for 5 years. I of course forced him into marriage when we found out we were having a baby. I even forced him to have an actual wedding a surprise me with an engagement ring.

In all the time that we have lived together, I have done all the cooking, cleaning, laundry, dishes and household chores. I pay all the bills, do all of the shopping and all of the scheduling. For us, it works. Dusty likes it, he has no worries. For me, I liked it because I know how to it right!

The problem with that situation for so long is, I end up overwhelmed. I had no issues when I wasn't working, that was my job. However, now I am a full-time at home mom with a full-time job. That is a lot of work. I get as much done as possible during the day, but I never have a break. My lunch hour consists of making lunch for Kaitlyn and I and cleaning upstairs. My breaks are playing with Kaitlyn and changing her, or feeding her, or trying to pick up something.

So, up until recently, my typical schedule was, get up by 6, shower, get dressed and ready. Give Kaitlyn a bath, make the beds, sort any dirty laundry and carry it downstairs, take any dirty dishes downstairs, clean the bathroom. Make Kaitlyn and I breakfast, walk Archie and get Kaitlyn set up with a few toys.Then, I would start a load of laundry and clean the office all by 10:00.

The next 8 hours include work and child care. Work includes showing apartments, returning phone calls, placing orders, writing notices, logging rent, posting notices, cleaning the pool, cleaning the laundry room, walking through empty apartments. This is all while playing with Kaitlyn, making our lunch, cleaning up the kitchen, doing the laundry, doing the dishes, picking up her room, taking Archie out, seperating the two of them when Kaitlyn is being rough and of course starting dinner.

My goal each day is to have dinner ready when Dusty gets home at 5:30. After we eat, I clean the kitchen, the living room and we hang out playing before bed.

Now, this has been really hard while pregnant. I have no energy, even more work lately, and I feel sick quite often.

In all the time we've lived together, Dusty has never cleaned a room, ever. This is mostly my fault. He's never needed to or been expected to.

This weekend it's all changed. Dusty, without being asked, without it being mentioned cleaned the entire downstairs. Not only that, he cleaned it every day. It's still clean now, Monday morning. He also also taken on "Kaitlyn duty" when he gets home from work. He waits on me hand and foot when he's home so I can rest. Without him, I would go insane. Literally, ya'll would be visiting me in a home.

A second pregnancy is so different. You aren't as spoiled I guess. Since it's your second child, you don't get as much "coddling" in a way I suppose lol. I kinda miss it, but, it in no way lessons the experiance. If I could, I would talk Baby and Kaitlyn all day. If only I could find someone interested in listening...

We're having a...

BOY!!!

I'm 12 weeks and 2 days, but the tech was able to use her years of experiance to spot the gender! She wouldn't give us a 100%, but she did say it was more than likely!

Visit Millerbaby.net for all of the ultra sound pictures!

02/14/07

I had to be in the office this morning at 7 AM. We didn't go to bed last night until nearly 11. Imagine my happy surprise when I opened my office door to see two dozen gorgeous red roses on my desk with a HUGE bag of my favorite candy!

I went up to tell Dusty thank you and he told me to look in Kaitlyn's room. On her nightstand he put a beautiful purple orchid to surprise her when she woke up! He stuck some monkey stickers and candy in the pot. She was so excited.

Isn't he the absolute greatest?

I had my doctor's appointment this morning and we did another u/s sound!

02/13/07

Children are absolutely amazing.

There is nothing more special in life than sharing a meaningful bond with a child. Knowing that a child recognizes who you are, trusts you and looks forward to seeing you.

Yesterday, I heard a story on the radio about women who are freezing their eggs and waiting until they are established in their careers before having children. These women were waiting until their very late thirties to mid forties and beyond. I wonder if they realize what it means to be a mommy?

I do not believe there is a career or a bank statement in this world worth trading children for. It is absolutely amazing to watch this person who you give birth to at a tender 7 pounds turn into a 30 pound toddler experiancing the world, knowing that every day they get bigger, older, smarter and have a greater understanding because of your role in it?

I wonder if those same women realize that there is never a right time to have a child. You will always want a bigger home, more room, more money, more security, more time, more everything.

When it comes down to it, children do not need a lot. They need love, which will come so naturally in such an abundance it'll scare you. They need to be nutured, which is something you will enjoy doing so intently that you'll deeply miss it when they no longer want your kisses or need you to feed them. They need a happy home. This does not equal a mansion on acres and acres of land, that can be just as cold as a snowy winter night, a home can be a shack for all they care as long as it is warmed with love and inviting to them.

Sure, it seems like children are expensive, but really they aren't. When they arrive you no longer feel that same desire to buy, buy, buy for yourself. Instead, you spend that money on them (except for those days when your loved ones insist you buy for you). Yes, children are work, but it's such an enjoyable work that it doesn't feel like work at all.

I am in no way saying that you should run out, find the first guy "that'll do" and have babies. But, if you are waiting for the right time, it'll never come. Instead, you'll miss out on the joys of having a child while still young enough to enjoy them.

I'm also not saying that all women should have children. There are far too many that probably shouldn't reproduce (Paris Hilton anyone?), but again, for those that know they want children but chose to freeze their eggs until the right time, please reconsider.

Then again, maybe it's the hormones talking.

Well, I'm pregnant!

It came as a complete surpise to both of us. We both want more children, and we both wanted to start trying this summer, but we were actively avoiding pregnancy.

However, it seems there were other plans for us! So, my Valentine's day is the arrow cupid struck right in my uterus!

It turns out I am about 7 1/2 weeks pregnant. We obviously do not know the sex yet, but we should know in about 12 weeks.

Thursday is our first pre-natel appointment with the pre-natel nurse. Our first doctor's appointment will be scheduled at that time. We're excited, happy and glad that Kaitlyn will be a big sister!