Saturday, June 30, 2007


Today made it four official weeks that we've been in the hospital. It's nearly our half way mark.

Today's doctor was Dr. Hedriana. He let us know that the majority of patients that make it this far make it to the 32 week mark, which was nice to hear.

Dr. Hedriana also ordered the betamethazone booster to be administered on Monday (when I hit 28 weeks), so I have that painful shot to look forward to :P

When I was admitted, I was one of 4 patients in antepardum. The full moon must have been in full force because last night, the other 3 patients all delivered twins. This floor has delivered nearly 2 dozen babies in the last 2 nights.

My blood pressure is staying about the same and my temp is staying low, so that's great. The contractions are still infrequent, but they are getting painful, which is no fun.

Thanks for checking on little Matthew! Enjoy the rest of your weekend!

Thursday, June 28, 2007



We're halfway through our 4th week, yay!!

Today wasn't too exciting. I'm up to 130 pounds now. The perinatologist should have the official ultra sound results tomorrow to go over. She hadn't received them by this morning, so I'm sure we'll discus it tomorrow.

I'm having some contractions, but they aren't at all regular or consistent, so they aren't anything to worry about.

My blood pressure is up from what it normally is, so we get to talk to the doctor about that tomorrow too.

Other than that, Matthew is looking great and we're still pregnant.

I'd like to thank Samantha and David for coming all the way from Monterey to visit. Thanks also to Kaitlyn for visiting today and Mom and Christina!! And of course, Dusty!

I'd like to give a special thank you to the girl-spot girls! You are all amazing.

Wednesday, June 27, 2007


We had our ultra sound today. I thought it would be this morning, but it wasn't until after 5:30! It actually worked out well since Dusty and Kaitlyn got to see Matthew :)

The ultra sound went well. I was hoping for much better results, but nothing was bad.

Matthew is measuring just about on time. His estimated weight is 2 pounds 6 ounces. That's awesome, he's still growing and pretty much on track.

The doctor thought we would have gained in fluid. Turns out we lost. The tech had a really hard time finding any pockets at all. We had 8.8 cm of fluid when I had my complete rupture and today we only had 8.4 cm. So, all the extra fluids I'm drinking doesn't seem to be helping at all :(

And, Matthew is still breech. His but is almost acting like a plug at this point and is wedged into the top of the birth canal, the way he is wedged it's almost like he's folded in half.

Because of the lack of fluid, it was really hard to make out any features. I asked about a 3-d and was told that we wouldn't be able to see any definition because of the lack of fluid.

Other than that, everything is pretty much the same. I had a few contractions today, but nothing to worry about. My blood pressure and temp are steady.

Tuesday, June 26, 2007


Another day down. We've now been here 3 weeks and 3 days!

Things are basically the same. Temp is pretty stable, no contractions and steady heart beat.

Dr. Lanouette was in today. She wanted to be sure that we knew that these 3 weeks have meant a world of difference to Matthew. Not only have his odds of survival increased greatly, but his entire quality of life has improved. The longer he stays in me, the better his chances are of not suffering from long term damage.

Tomorrow is our ultra sound! I'll be sure to update when we're done :D

I also got all of the baby shower invites in and addressed. They should be mailed out tomorrow :)

Monday, June 25, 2007


We're ending another day! Today, we hit 27 weeks, yay!!!

Not to much happened today. I have met with the lactation consultants. As soon as Matthew is born I will be set up with everything necessary to start pumping. Colostrum is incredibly beneficial to preemies and we want to be sure Matthew gets the best possible start.

I've started having some round ligament pain. which is not at all enjoyable let me tell ya! I also have some pain towards the top of my stomach that we're keeping an eye on.

Other than that, nothing's new, same temp, same blood pressure, same room ;)

We are still having the baby shower curtesy of Grandma, Nana, Auntie Christy, Auntie Christina, Auntie Sammie and Auntie Jamie. I'm sure Matthew will be very grateful! My invitations should be here tomorrow! If you'd like to see them, let me know and I can e-mail them. If you'd like to attend, just make sure I have your address ;) The day will center around Dusty and Kaitlyn. There will be a video camera so I can see everything to :D

Sunday, June 24, 2007


We have officially completed 3 weeks in the hospital, yay!!

Today was another uneventful day. The baby is looking good, my temperature is staying the same and my blood pressure is looking good!

I had a lot of visitors today and enjoyed my 25th birthday! I'd like to give a thanks to: Dusty, Kaitlyn, Mom, Dad, Judy, Christy, Dennis, Camaryn, Christina, Brian, Jamie, Scotty, Grandma Mauda, Auntie Beth, Uncle Paul, Felecia, and Jamie all for visiting today. I really appreciate it and my room easily looks like a flower shop!

Thanks also to Samantha, David, Aunt Barbara and Stephanie for calling!

I hope everyone is enjoying their summer!! Have a great day! Tomorrow we hit 27 weeks woo-hoo!!

Saturday, June 23, 2007


Hi ya'll!!

Well, we finished another day without much to report.

Today I had my favorite nurse. When she was putting the fetal heart rate monitor today she noticed that Matthew's position was different. She thinks he may have moved head down. This would be great news and allow a safe vaginal delivery, which would be ideal!!

I've also been put on a high calorie diet. In 2 days I've gained a pound and a half!

So, everything is staying nice and steady, YAY!!

Friday, June 22, 2007



We are ending our 19th day here at Mercy San Juan Medical Center.

We'd like to wish Aunt Jamie a Happy Birthday!

Today I was supposed to have an ultra sound. It didn't quite work out that way. For our last ultra sound, the machine was brought into our room. Dr. Hasslein decided it would be better to wait to ensure that there is some growth and that he woud rather do a level 2 ultra sound. Matthew only has 2 vessels, so they need to be sure that he is developing everywhere properly. This means instead of the ultra sound being rolled to me, I'll be rolled to the ultra sound, on a gurney. For some reason, that does not sound fun!

I am now on these drinks called "Mighty Shakes" 3 times a day, in addition to my meals and snacks. In 4 ounces, they are 200 calories to add to my daily intake. I get weighed again tomorrow. So, we'll see if they make any difference.

Other than that, everything is the same. No contractions, no infection and us still waiting and hoping for much more time...

Thursday, June 21, 2007


It's funny, since I've been stuck in this darned bed, I've heard from people "There's no way I could do that." To be honest, before I learned that I would be destined to spend weeks maybe months in a hospital bed, I thought the same thing.

But really, what choice do you have? Sure, I could have said "Nope, I'm not staying here, I'm going home" and then I could have gotten an infection delivered way too soon and risked both Matthew's life and my own. Or, I could just listen, truly listen.

I've been reading a lot of stories at the March of Dimes. Miracles born earlier than Matthew will be with no permanent health delays or very slight ones. Every story shared the same thought "Why me?" There have been times it would be easy to wonder "Why me?" but really "Why not me?"

I could think of all the things I did wrong during my pregnancy. Maybe I should have cut back on work hours. Maybe I should have stopped carrying Kaitlyn, but I had a healthy pregnancy and had no restrictions. I did a lot of things right during my pregnancy. I gained weight, I gave up all the "no-no" foods, even the "maybe not" foods. I stayed active, I slept well.

Really, I can be thankful. I can be thankful that something woke me up that night and that I realized that something was wrong. I am thankful that I didn't change my clothes and go back to bed. I am thankful that we live so close to such an amazing hospital. I am thankful that we didn't deliver that night and I'm thankful that we've lasted 18 days with no end in sight without delivering.

I know Dusty has been amazing and completely selfless in the past 2 1/2 weeks. With the exception of two nights he has insisted on sleeping on an uncomfortable pull out bed that shifts and twists thoughout the night. This man who does not like change at all has had to change everything in his life that is routine and comfortable. And he hasn't once complained to me. He hasn't once come to the hospital to complain about anything and not once has he come in here in a bad or foul mood. He has every reason to be stressed out and tense but he never shows it when he gets here.

So, really, I have two options.

The first option is to have complete self pity. Play the woe is me card. Be sad that I have to spend my birthday in the hospital and dwell on everything in this pregnancy that I am missing out on (like the beach maternity pictures I really wanted!). To me, that sounds absolutely miserable. What would be the point?

Or, I can just deal with it. One day at a time. I can try to stay busy and entertained and realize that this too shall pass. By this time next year everything will be back to normal. We'll be home, all of us and we'll be back in our normal family routine.

I chose option 2.


Another day as passed! Today we'd like to wish Aunt Christy a Happy Birthday.

Not too many new developments here. Dr. Hasslein has scheduled us for an ultra sound for tomorrow. He wants to check both growth and fluid levels. We had 8.8 cm when I ruptured, so we are hoping for at least that much, but more would be excellent!

I have gained a pound this week. I feel like I'm eating constantly, but they still want to see more weight gain, so I will now be weighed every other day.

That's basically it. No infection, Matthew looks good and everything is moving along steadily.

I hope everyone enjoyed the first day of summer!

Wednesday, June 20, 2007



Hi everyone! It's been another quiet day. I did pass my glucose test. You're allowed to have a sugar level of 140 and I was 139, yay me!! We'l do another test when I hit 28 weeks to see how I'm doing.

I've been contraction and bleeding free all day. I do still have the back spasms, but the heating pad and tylenol do help a bit.

Matthew still looks great. His heart is wonderful and he's moving quite a bit which is good. So, I'm stable and just hanging out in a hospital bed.

Yesterday, I did get to go on my first wheelchair ride. Dusty took me all around outside. I only have a 20 minute time limit so I obviously couldn't make a break for it, but it was nice to go outside.

I hope everyone is having a great day!!

Tuesday, June 19, 2007


So, the doctor was in again today and it turns out that while I didn't fail my glucose, my results were abnormal.

So, I have to re-do the 1 hour test today. I have to drink the yucky orange drink again and hope that my results are normal :)

In other news, last night wasn't that much fun. I was having some pain while breathing so the doctor thinks I have a spinal/muscle spasm. I'm on tyenol and heating pads to try and control it. If it doesn't go away, I have to be tested for infection or a lung embolism. Let's just hope it goes away!



We're ending our 16th day today! Let's see, last night I developed a spinal/muscle spasm. So, it hurts to breath. I'm taking tylenol and have a heat pack to try and ease the pain.

I'm contraction free and the doctor thinks Matthew looks great.

It turns out, I did have an abnormal glucose test, with that and my sugars being high after lunch yesterday, I had to re-do the glucose test this afternoon. The results should be back tomorrow moring.

That's all. We're just getting ready for bed and ready for tomorrow!

Monday, June 18, 2007


I had our perinatologist meeting a few minutes ago and thought I would update with our newest updates.

Turns out, I didn't pass my glucose :( There was a slight mix up and my sugars were high, especially considering that I had fasted for over 7 hours. I'll get my sugars tested after every meal for the next few days. If my sugars lower and level out we can stop and move on to retest sugars again at 28 weeks.

The doctor feels more comfortable delivering Matthew at 32 weeks. That would take us until July 30. The doctor is hoping that we'll get to 30 weeks, but he isn't too confident how much further than that we'll get. Right now, we are just waiting it out and hoping an infection doesn't take hold.

That's where we're at now :)



Turns out the doctor made a slight mistake and read the wrong patient chart! I did pass my glucose test. My first finger prick was high, but he isn't concerned, so yay!

The rest of the information from my previous post remains true, we're looking at delivering by 32 weeks.

Sunday, June 17, 2007



Today is nearly over. We have Shelley for our nurse tonight. She was the first nurse we had when we came into Labor and Delivery and nervously approached the nurses station. I really like Shelley. She reminds me a lot of Melanie.

Today was pretty uneventful. At least for us, a lot of babies were delivered today so I heard a lot of commotion in the nursery as babies cried and families were over come by joy.

Matthew is growing. His kicks, punches, rolls, and stretches are much stronger and can be seen outside of my belly. Maybe daddy's right, maybe he will come out looking like Arnold!

Because I've lost 5 pounds in the last 2 weeks (but still mantain a 27 pound weight gain for the pregnancy) I get more snacks. Let me tell ya, if you can't exersise or move around, all that food takes longer to digest and it's longer before you are hungry. So, I am stuffed all the time. With mostly healthy food and milk. But hey, if it means Matthew will be bigger, bring on all the cake, salad and Turkey sandwiches you can!

Grandma and Grandpa brought Kaitlyn by today before heading to her favorite place in the whole wide world, Chuck E. Cheese! Two times in one week for that little girl, what a lucky girl! Daddy also cooked me a delicious dinner that Matthew and I both got to enjoy :)

Today was really uneventful. My blood pressure is normal, my temp is normal, Matthew's heart rate is normal, contractions are few and far between and the best part: We're still pregnant!


And things will go back to normal. Well, it will probably be a new type of normal, but nonetheless, it will go back to our normal.

Right now, I try to ignore things that could possibly stress me out or infuriate me. There isn't much I can do about certain things now and just because I chose to ignore the actions of one doesn't mean that I approve in any shape, way or form of them. I know that my opinion (that Dusty has already expressed he more than shares with me) will not be the popular one and it will without a doubt cause drama and trash talking that Matthew and I don't need right now. That however, does not mean it will not be addressed in the future.

I honestly cannot understand how one month a person can refer to a child has too retarded to talk and then pretend like they can just walk right back in when it's convienant for that one person. I can't play the "pretend it never happened game" and honestly, I have no desire to do so, especially when it comes to my daughter.

I really look forward to going home. I look forward to sleeping in my bed, showering standing up, taking baths, chosing when I eat and what it is, putting Kaitlyn to bed, being with her when she wakes up, walking outside (even if it's just to the mailbox), going out to eat, making cupcakes, shopping, and spending time with friends and family where I can actually get out of bed :)

Thank you so much to those that have made things as easy as possible for Kaitlyn, myself and I. It is appreciated more than you'll ever know.



First, Happy Father's Day to all of the awesome daddies in our life.

Today was the 15th day post pPROM. Tomorrow we hit 26 weeks!! Yay! We will be able to safely delivery by cesarean section by tomorrow which is great news for both Matthew and myself.

Today was pretty uneventful. I did get approved for a daily wheelchair ride of 20 minutes. Unfortunately, the way things worked out today, I didn't get to take it :( But, there is always tomorrow!

Thanks to Daddy for visiting with Kaitlyn, and Nana, Papa, Auntie Christy, Uncle Dennis and Camaryn. Thank you also to Aunt Beth and Uncle Paul, Christina and Brian and then to Grandma and Grandpa for visiting and bringing Kaitlyn with them!

So, we're still pregnant, being monitored and just waiting and hoping to stay pregnant for as long as possible!

Friday, June 15, 2007


Happy Friday! And, day 13 for us! It's more than halfway over and we're really stable! It's almost hard to believe that nearly 2 weeks have already passes.

Today has been fairly uneventful. I saw Kaitlyn nice and early and have Priscilla as my nurse. I'm pretty sure she's my favorite. I have a top 3 team that I like the best and she's easily the top two there.

I saw the doctor today. He and the dietician aren't thrilled with the weight I've lost since being in the hospital so my caloric intake is being increased and I will be weighed every day to increase my weight gain and therefore increase Matthew's weight gain. The plumper he is when he's delivered the better chance he'll have at maintaining body temperature, a huge problem with preemies.

Dr. Haesslein thinks my uterus feels soft. This is good news, he thinks that the fluid has replenished itself substantially since we first came in. He is going to do another ultra sound himself next week to see where we stand. The more fluid Matthew has, the more room he has to grow AND the extra fluid allows him the opportunity to practice breathing as a normal baby in the womb would do at this age. Typically with low fluid, babies don't have enough to do it. I'm hoping that his fluid has increased to a more normal level and hopefully the bed rest we have to continue, the fluid will sustain a high level.

We also found out more information about our 3rd shot of steroids. The plan is that we are going to try and wait until 28 weeks to give the steroid booster. Studies are not clear as to how well the steroids work early in gestation so they want to wait as long as possible to give the third shot to give it the best chance of working. However, at any time I become unstable prior to that, I will be given the booster immediately.

Thursday, June 14, 2007


Day 12 was a nice and calm day :) It's now coming to an end, all we have is another 1/2 hour on the monitor and then we can go to bed.

Today was pretty uneventful. I am still having some slight bleeding, but it's still considered normal.

I met with the dietician today. I got a new menu and snacks added to my daily diet, yay me. I've also had weekly weigh-ins added to my schedule to ensure I have proper weight gain and caloric intake.

So, we're ready to start into day 13! Thanks so much to Nana and Kaitlyn for visiting as well as Grandma, Grandma, Auntie Christina and Aunt Jamie for visiting!

Wednesday, June 13, 2007


Day 11 is coming to an end.

I'm very pleased to announce that today was an uneventful day! Yay!

I found out that I passed my glucose test, which is awesome news. I wasn't looking forward to the prospect of doing a 3 hour test. Then again, I haven't had Krispy Kreme in a while so my sugar should be good!

My doctor said I looked a lot better today than I did on Monday. I looked in the mirror, I must have looked like death on Monday lol!

I am still having some slight bleeding. My nurses have made notes of it for the doctor, but it's expected. I just have to be sure that I'm monitoring it and reporting it, which I make sure of at all times.

I've only had 2 contractions all day, and they were short and weak. That's exactly what the doctor likes to hear. We were also complimented on 2 things, 1: How neat and clean our room was and 2: How good I am about wearing my compression stockings.

So, keep those positive thoughts going, they are working so far!

Tuesday, June 12, 2007


Day 10 is now coming to an end.

It would have been wonderful if it was a slow day, but unfortunatly it wasn't.

The nurses had me up until 2 AM. I was having contractions and Matthew's heart rate would drop in the 80-90 range through each one. They were also slightly longer coming in at nearly 45 seconds to a minute where they had been 15-30 seconds. This meant I had to stay on both the heart monitor and the contraction monitor until the wee hours of the morning, I finally fell asleep after 2 and they worked with the wires and monitors while I slept. I was just so tired.

This morning got started at 6:15 AM. I was warned that I would be having my glucose test first thing in the morning. I was not at all happy about being woken up after our long night! I was still on the contraction monitor. At about 7:45 the lab came in and my blood was drawn for the "pre-test." I then was given my *gag* orange drink to chug down quickly. Let me tell ya, if you didn't eat much the day before and are getting over the stomach flu, orange syrup that tastes like flat soda is the LAST thing you want to chug. An hour later, and many veins later, my blood was drawn again.

From there, I got breakfast and some rest. A bit before lunch, I had my IV of fluids discontiued and flushed. After that I went up to use the restroom and discovered a small bit of bright red blood. I called the nurse immediatly. I had to go back to my bed being 100% flat and not moving at all for anything. I was given instructions that I had to call the nurse if I had to use the restroom and the threat that if the bleeding continued I would have my bathroom privelages revoked. Lucky for me, there hasn't been any bleeding since then.

I'm back to having visitors. They just request (as do I) that if you are sick, have been sick, have been around sick people or think that you may be sick, you wait before visiting and that all visitors wash and sanitize their hands. Another case like yesterday and we may not be as lucky.

I did get to see both of my princesses today!! Camaryn came up with Kaitlyn to visit. Kaitlyn stayed while Nana, Auntie Christy and Camaryn went shopping. I could not believe how long Camaryn's hair has gotten in the psat 10 days! Kaitlyn was a sweetheart. She has a really hard time sitting still though and I think Daddy's nerves were a little frazzled.

I have found an amazing site that is all about pPROM (Pre-term, premature rupture of membranes) that has been incredibly helpful. If you have a chance, check it out: pPROM

We'd also like to give a big thank you to Aunt Stephanie, Uncle Craig, Hope and Great Grandma Bobbie for their generous gifts of shopping ;) What better way to pass the time?

Thanks for reading, thanks for visiting and we greatly look forward to getting to day 11 in our journey tomorrow!

Monday, June 11, 2007


06/11/07 AM

Last night was really rough. I woke up around 1 AM really restess and unable to sleep. My back hurt, my tummy hurt, I couldn't get comfortable and was just plain miserable.

At about 2:15 I called the nurse because my tummy was so upset and I was hoping she could give me something to sleep.

The problem was the anti-nausea medication I was prescribed was by IV only. So, we decided to instead try some 7-up, laying on my side and resting.

One sip of soda and I was done for. I ran to the bathroom and started throwing up violently enough to wake Dusty up and get him out of bed. Thank goodness he was there, I was so sick and made such a mess.

While Dusty helped to clean me up, he called the Nurse. She called the doctor while putting me on the monitor. An IV was re-inserted. I was given fluids and the anti-nausea medication.

I quickly fell asleep. Every hour or so, the nurse would come in because I kept having contractions. I was so tired, I didn't feel them at all.

My temp was taken again at 6 and I had a fever. My fluids were upped to as high as they could safely go and the doctor was called.

I met with the doctor a little while ago. I have a viral infection which complicates everything. I cannot have any visitors until I am free of fever and all symptoms and I have to screen my visitors to prevent any more infections. My immune system is now weakened and we can't have this again.

Right now, I am on the fluids. The contractions have slowed down and Matthew's heart rate is staying steady. As long as those things continue, we can hold off on delivery. If they change, the plan changes.

So, our goal is to get through the next 24 hours as smooth as possible and put this bump behind us.


We are coming to another end of another day. I am so grateful that we were able to get through this day. I was really worried that we would not be able to.

I spent a good part of the day sleeping. The anti-nausea medication made me really sleepy, which I welcomed since I felt awful. At about 3, I woke up for good and my temp was taken again.
My temp had raised to 101 and my blood pressure dropped to 96/48. The nurse took it 3 times to be sure it wasn't a fluke of some sort. We were unhappy to say that it wasn't. L

The nurse then got an order for Tylenol, which was something that my head was very happy for. I began nibbling on crackers and taking sips of water and lemon-lime soda. While my stomach was still weary, it wasn't nearly as upset as it was before.

I'm now on my 4th bag of fluid for the day. My body must have been a good bit dehydrated since even after about 2700 ml of fluid and drinking water, I still haven't filled my bladder once.

My fever has come down. I'm back to my normal 98.4, woo-hoo! So, we get to go another day.

Hopefully, everything will stay this way and tomorrow I can resume visitation. We've been told by both nurses and the doctor that Dusty is now in charge of making sure that visitors are healthy and sanitize when they come. If there is any doubt at all, then it's best for the visitor to wait a day or two.

Sunday, June 10, 2007


Being stuck in a hospital bed gives you a lot of time. If you have the internet that time can be used to search like crazy on anything you want with few interruptions.

I found a great website on the March of Dime's Home page. I personally think the March of Dimes is an amazing organization. It's one we have donated to since Kaitlyn's been born.

On there are many stories by women who have delivered their baby's prematurely and spend time in the NICU. One of the threads on their page was about the comments they've received from friends and family after delivering. Some of these women had their baby's in NICU's for 3+ months and some mothers lost their baby's after trying everything they could to save them.

The comments I've most frequently read include:

* Well, at least you didn't gain a bunch of weight and get stretch marks
* At least you didn't have to push out a big baby
* At least you didn't have to have a long drawn out pregnancy
* So, the NICU is like a free babysitter?

Believe me, there were many, many more. These are the ones that came up for nearly every mommy though.

Let me tell ya, if I heard one of these comments, please do not be offended if I punch the person in the face.

Believe me, I understand wanting to make things seem brighter, but for many people pregnancy isn't this terrible thing that a woman would trade in for her child to live in a plastic home wondering if they'll live long enough to come home and if they do, if they will have any serious defects from it.

So please, if you think of saying one of those things to a woman who gave birth to a preemie, PLEASE reconsider.

Right now, my goal is to not go into labor. Sounds easy enough right? Well, that basically involves laying in a flat bed and only getting up every few hours to pee. No going outside, no going for walks, no shopping in stores, no playing with Kaitlyn, no sleeping in my own bed, no trips or vacations, heck, I can't even straighten up my own room. Laying for that long and completely depending on the care of others is far from easy. Especially if you are a control freak who typically has a say on everything. Not just a say, but a say that truly matters.

Believe me, I am incredibly grateful for all that everyone is doing, I truly am. I know that Kaitlyn can be a handful. There's a reason why she naps and sleeps so good, it's because the longest she'll sit still is 42 seconds, and even then, she is twitching or moving or telling you a story.

But, I miss that.

It's not easy going from seeing her 24 hours a day, giving her baths, combing her hair, brushing her teeth, getting her dressed, putting cartoons on for her, making her meals, playing games with her, practicing her dance with her, taking her out for a special treat, carrying her to bed for her nap, saying night nights with her, getting her to bed and everything else that comes with being her mom to going to seeing her at most a couple hours a day and not even being able to pick her up. Nothing will make that easier.

I know it isn't easy for Dusty. His time is spent being split in so many different ways. I know he hates to leave the hospital. But, I know he hates to leave Kaitlyn. I know he's running around like a chicken with his head cut off trying to be everywhere at once and doing as much as he can as quickly as he can so that he can get back to me or to Kaitlyn. And even though I tell him he doesn't have to sleep here, I know that it makes him feel better to do so, no matter how uncomfortable the bed is. All I can hope is that he's being supported to do what he thinks is right when he feels that it's right. I'm sure he has enough guilt when he's at one place and not the other and I don't want that to be worse on him. We all know Dusty isn't exactly the best at sharing his feelings.

And one more thing. This is just a mild irritation. If you want to know how I'm doing, or how Matthew is doing, please don't hesitate to call me or e-mail me. It totally isn't necessary to pass messages through another source at all. If my mom tells me one more time about so and so, I will scream! You are not bothering me, I'm stuck in bed, discouraged from napping, how bothered could I possibly be? I enjoy e-mails, myspace messages, comments, phone calls, I enjoy passing the time. I'm also pregnant and hormonal, if you call and for some reason it's a bad time I'll either not answer the phone, or I'll tell you. Ask my mom, I always hang up on her when the nurse comes in lol!


And we have passed an entire week. We've experianced a week in the hospital and we're still going nice and stable.

I had Dr. Husslein again today. He's still happy with our "breech baby" and how we're progessing. My blood pressure is staying stable, my temperature is staying in the 98.2-98.7 range, my contractions are staying at under 2 per hour, Matthew is still active with a strong heart beat and I do not show any sign of infection.

Matthew is even lower tonight than he was earlier today, so I'm going to ask the doctor tomorrow to make sure that it's ok.

Today was a bit of a boring day. My cell phone battery only lasts 4 hours and all that was on TV was golf :( And Mash :(

Thanks so much to Great Gramdna for visiting, to Grandma and Grandpa and Auntie Christina for visiting (and bringing Sopranos) and to Kaitlyn for visiting. An of course, thanks to daddy for everything!

Saturday, June 9, 2007


Another day has passed and we're still pregnant! Yay!

Dr. Haesslein was our doctor today. I really like him. I had one long contraction while he was here today so he monitored it and decided it was perfectly normal. He has decided that as long as I stay stable for the next coupe of weeks I will have a booster shot of steroids. That can greatly help Matthew's breathing when he is born.

Today was an ok day. Kaitlyn was sick this morning so I didn't think I would get to see her, but by about lunch time, she was free of fever and vomit so I got to see her for a couple of hours. Dusty went into work today for a few hours and then rested. He has a touch of the stomach flu too.

Kaitlyn and Grandma brought me yummy Olive Garden for dinner. Kaitlyn was here for a couple of hours tonight and was so excited when Dusty came in with her Max and Ruby. She spoiled him with lots of kisses.

Tomorrow marks our 1 week goal! That gives Matthew plenty of time to feel the effects of the steroids as well as increase our probability of going longer with the pregnancy!!

Thanks so much to Aunt Beth for her phone call and to mommy's friend Julie who called all the way from England! Thanks to Grandma and Grandpa for visitng and of course Daddy and Kaitlyn. Thanks to Grandma and Grandpa, Kaitlyn, Nana, Papa, Auntie Jamie and Uncle Joel and Auntie Christina for visiting yesterday!

Thursday, June 7, 2007


Well, we're half way through another day.

There isn't much new to report. I was weaned off the Magnesium yesterday. I felt a few small contractions last night, so I was monitored through the night to be sure labor hadn't started. I didn't have a single contraction all night or morning so I didn't have to be put on the Magnesium.

My IV site was starting to get red and puffy so it was removed to prevent infection. That was really nice. At least, it's nice until it has to be re-installed.

This morning I met with one of my new doctor's, Dr. Haesslein, who was very nice. He was really pleased with how strong Matthew's heart rate was on the monitor for his gestational age.

I have been scheduled to have a CVC test done on Saturday. This will give us a baseline for my white blood cell count so that it'll be easier to see if and when I develop an infection.

We again went over the plan, which is to stay pregnant until 34 weeks. We are going strong and trying to get past Sunday when the statistics are on my side.

I'm now finished with all but 1 antibiotic. I'll continue with the amoxicillian for a while because statistics have shown that it can help delay the onset of labor after rupture of amniotic fluid.

I'm a bit flemy today. I told the nurse who checked me all out. It's believed to be because of the Magnesium. The Magnesium left in my body is also causing some nose bleeds. Hopefully, it should all pass by tomorrow, if not, then he doctor will probably start more meds :(

I'd like to thank Mike and Mary for the beautiful flowers, Auntie Sammie for taking Kaitlyn to the zoo, Grandma, Grandpa, Nana, Auntie Christina and Auntie Christy for visiting last night. Thank you to Auntie Christy for the yummy candy and all the goodies she brought last night.

Thank you to Auntie Sammie, Papa, Kaitlyn, Aunt Stephanie, Uncle Craig and Hope for visiting today!

Wednesday, June 6, 2007


Well, we're half way through another day.

Today hasn't been too inventful. This morning, I was weaned off my Magnesium Sulfate. I ended it at 2 PM. That meant I could have th IV lines removed for the time being. If I continue for 6 hours without any contractions, I get to have my IV completely removed. My hand would really appreciate it.

I got to take a shower today. I have a 5 minute time limit and I have to sit on a shower chair, but it was still well worth it.

Dr. Zielinsky has transfered my care to the Perinatologist. They handle all of the high risk pregnancies in the Sacramento area. While, I love Dr. Z and he delivered Kaitlyn, the Perinatologist will be better able to do everything possible to keep me pregnant and they practically live on this floor.

I had a physical therapy consult today. Basically I "learned" the best ways to move without using my abdomen. I also got to practice some range of motion excersises so that I can keep my ankles, shoulders and arms feeling good.

I want to thank Kaitlyn, Grandma, Nana, Auntie Christina, Auntie Samantha and Daddy for being here last night. Thank you also to Great Grandma Mauda for the flowers today and to Mary and Mike for the flowers.

Also, thank you to Auntie Sammie for taking Kaitlyn to the zoo today to see the penguins. I heard she had a great time! I'll update again if anything new happens :)

Tuesday, June 5, 2007



Not much of an update, we're at 24 weeks based on ultra sound sizing which is great news. We've also had enough time pass so that the steroid shot should have already helped Matthew's lung development.

I'm still leaking fluid and having 1-2 contractions an hour, which isn't too bad since they aren't consistent or painful.

I will start some physical therapy sometime today, which will be a nice change. Tomorrow I should be able to have shower privelages. That'll mean 5 minutes while sitting. Let me tell ya, I can't wait to wash my hair.

I have an air mattress now which is much more comfortable. I'll get massaging boots for my legs sometime tomorrow as well.

If I continue as I am now, I'll get to have all the IVs out tomorrow night, which would make me so happy abd much more comfortable.

Our most immediate goal is to stay pregnant until Sunday. If we can get through those first 7 days, our chances go way up of continuing. Right now, we have a 50% chance of doing that.

Dr. Z said that we will have a long term goal of 32 weeks and I will deliver no later than 34 weeks. So, Matthew will be here by August 14, 2007. If we get to that day, there is a really strong possibility that we can avoid a NICU stay.

Monday, June 4, 2007


I'm going to try and do a daily update with what's going on.

Right now, there aren't a lot of updates. I got my last steroid shot at 4 this morning. At the same time my IV blew and I had to get a new one. Ouch.

This morning, we met with the perinatologist. She asked what we would like done *if* I deliver this week. A problem we have is Matthew is breech. He is butt down. A cesarean section at this point has a higher risk of complications. Typically, the uterus is big enough to have a vertical cut, Matthew's is not. So, at this point we would have to have a horizontal cut. The risks of a horizontal cut would be the higher risk of maternal hemorging and the very high risk with future pregnancies experiancing uterine abruption, which could cause death.

Matthew is small now so a vaginal delivery would not be a problem and would not cause any damage to him, so we've decided that we would try to deliver him breech if I deliver very soon. As time progresses, we will obviously change to cesarean as soon as it's safe.

I have had my fluids limited. Since I'm on so many fluids and the magnesium slows my heart and my kidneys we have to try and prevent me from backwashing fluids into my lungs and causing future problems. That sucks. My mouth is always dry with the magnesium, so I can sip or chew on ice.

I am no longer on constant monitoring. My uterus is stable enough where I only have to be monitored for 1 hour every 8 hours. So, it's much easier to get comfortable.

I really want to thank everyone for everything. Thank you so much Nana and Papa and Grandma and Grandpa for taking over most of Kaitlyn's care for Dusty and I. I know from experiance that a 2 1/2 year old is not the easiest thing in the world and even daily visits of a couple of hours is a huge difference from total care. Thank you also to Aunt Christy and Uncle Dennis and Camaryn for being so supportive with Kaitlyn and bringing her to visit. I can't wait to see Camaryn again.

Thank you to Auntie Christina, Uncle Brian, Aunt Beth, Felecia, and everyone else for visiting. The time is going to slow. Thank you Melanie for the great time passing things that I am so sure are going to seriously come in handy over the next day or two.

Thank you Aunt Linda, Aunt Barbara, Aunt Inez and Penny for your phone calls. I sincerely and honestly appreciate all the kind words, positive thoughts and prayers, and I know that Dusty does too.

Sunday, June 3, 2007

My Water Broke

Hey guys.

Well, I'm at the hospital.

Last night, I went to bed around 10, Kaitlyn wanted to sleep with us and I had no problem at all with snuggling with her.

At around 12:30, I had a dream that I was wet and it woke me up. I jumped out of bed and noticed that my sweatpants, and the bed were both soaked.

I thought to myself, maybe I drank too much water and just had an accident in bed. I went to the bathroom and emptied my full bladder. When I stood up, liquid kept gushing out. I got Dusty and called the doctor who suggested I go in just to be sure it was urine. I kept thinking that I needed to do more kegal exercises.

We dropped a sad Kaitlyn and a happy Archie off at Nana and Papa's house. Then, we headed to the hospital.

We arrived at the hospital at about 1 Am and they started testing to see what was leaking. The first test was inconclusive. At 3 AM, we got the news I was dreading, my water had indeed broke. During the same time I was on the fetal contraction monitor. Although I wasn't feeling them, I was having steady contractions every 4 minutes. At not quite 24 weeks, that is not good.

I was immediately started on Magenisum Sulfate, Antiobiotics and fluids to try and replenish my bag waters. I was also given a steroid shot to try and help mature Matthew's lungs, just in case.

We have talked to the perinatal specialist as well as the head doctor of the NICU. We are incredibly fortunate that we are at this hospital. They have a level 4 NICU and one of the best in the Nation.

We also had an ultra sound this morning. I am constantly leaking fluids but Matthew still has a good amount around him. Him and I are both responding well to the Magnesium, considering. His heart beat is staying good and steady and his kidneys are working really good by flushing it out.

My contractions are under control. Maybe 1 an hour. I will stay on the Magnesium and strict hospital bed rest until I deliver. The ultra sound showed Matthew's gestational age as 23w5d. We are taking one day and one goal at a time. Right now, our goal is to get to 24 weeks. That is when we have the best chance for survival, although the risk of problems are incredibly high. If we can get to 28 weeks, I will be so grateful and the NICU said they would be thrilled.

So, right now, I am prepared for delivery. We've had to decide what we want to do for Matthew if he is born too soon. We were given the options of either allowing him to fight on his own and pass or to put forth all heroic measures. If he is delivered in the next couple of days, it is unlikely that he will survive and if he does, there will be severe delays and more than likely brain damage. We have decided that we want all measures taken to get him stable and then decide our next step at that point.

I have had my rhogam shot (ow) and am anticipating the next steroid shot. As long as I can keep free of infection, I can keep from delivering and they will keep preventing labor. I miss Kaitlyn terribly. She will be staying with Nana and Papa and Grandma and Grandpa. Daddy has been great and so has everyone else. I appreciate all everyone has done for us.

I will have fast internet connection tomorrow and will keep updates going as we have them.